Is your morning routine exhausting for your family?

Morning routines at our house use to be quite dreadful. We’ve come a long way from mornings where tears and chaos were the norm. Over the years, we’ve learned from other parents and sometimes by trial and error ways to make our mornings less stressful and exhausting.

With a little planning, you can reduce the number of temper tantrums, arguments and “I left my homework on the kitchen table” situations, and hopefully arrive at work a little less stressed.

Below are some things that work for my family. Real Simple offers a few more ideas on managing morning routines.

Pack all the essentials the night before (lunches, homework, snow clothes, work bags, etc.). If you’re not staying home the next day, pack everything you need for the next day the night before. Have the kids help make their lunches (even if it’s just packing their snacks and beverages), determine what the kids will need for school – gym shoes, snow clothes, homework – and have them put it in their bag. The same goes for parents.

Pick out clothes the night before. Check the weather forecast for the next day, tell your kids what’s appropriate for them to wear based on the weather and school activities. This will help eliminate discussions in the morning about what your kids can and cannot wear. This is a great tip for parents too.

Wake the kids up early with a morning ritual. Our girls do not like to get out of bed in the morning. To compensate for the 30 minutes it took them to get up, we started waking them up 30 minutes earlier, adjusting their bedtime accordingly. During this time, they can do whatever they want, but they know that at 6:30 a.m. it’s time to get moving. I wake them up by turning on their lamps, opening their blinds (when the sun is out), and we give them a glass of milk (my girls LOVE milk) and their vitamins. We recently started listening to their favorite songs while they get ready. It’s a great motivator for them and puts them in a better mood.

One final check. Before my oldest daughter and I head out the door, we run down the list of all the things she and I need for the day. I wish I would have started doing this sooner; it would have saved me several trips back home because she forgot her homework on the kitchen table!

What works for your family? How do you manage your morning routine?

Develop a plan to end chore wars in your home

Let’s face it, household chores aren’t on anyone’s list of fun things to do. In fact, they are a source of contention for most couples. According to an article in Today – Health, about 1 in 5 Americans argue monthly about chores. Left unaddressed, these arguments can lead to resentment of your spouse.

Couples need to find a way to share the responsibility of household chores that works for them and their schedules. Put an end to the neat freak vs. slob battle with a few simple ground rules.

Discuss chores and errands with your spouse and family – Make a list of what needs to get done daily, weekly and monthly. Decide who will do what or volunteer for things you’re good at. If you like cooking, but hate folding laundry then see if your spouse will do the laundry. If there are chores no one wants to do, then develop a rotation schedule so everyone shares the job.

No bickering – Bickering only creates arguments, and who has time for that? Clearly define expectations for checking chores off the to do list taking into account personal and family commitments and late nights at the office.

Make good on your promise – If you told your spouse you would do specific chores on certain days, do them. Making excuses only prolongs the inevitable and can lead to an argument if your spouse thinks you’re trying to get out of doing your chores.

Don’t be critical – Nothing is worse than finishing a chore only to hear your spouse critique your hard work. Compliment your spouse’s efforts even if the chore isn’t done the exact way you would have done it. Work together to keep each other motivated. Other good tips can be found in my blog on re-evaluating your expectations.

There’s an app for that – If you’re having a hard time motivating your kids to help out, there are a variety of apps you can download for your phone, tablet or computer. Be sure to find ones that meet your needs and are appropriate for your children.

Fine-tune your plan as you go. Stick with what works and adjust the other chores accordingly. Hopefully, arguing about who’s going to take the garbage out this week will be a thing of the past.

What’s your strategy for managing chore wars in your home?

Pressed for time? Simple ways to spend quality time with your children

Since I returned to work full-time we’ve had to rely on a support system to help care for our girls. I often wonder if I spend enough quality time with them. It’s a hard question to ask myself since I always had at least one parent home throughout my entire childhood. However, I quickly learned that even though my time with my girls is limited, it can still be just as meaningful.

Quality time with your children can be anything – arts and crafts, reading or taking a walk. Over the years, my focus has shifted from the number of hours I spend with my children to what we do during that time. That’s what matters the most to them. They don’t want (or need) an extravagant activity or outing. They want my time and attention, and if we can have some fun then that’s even better! 

During the week, our quality time is at the dinner table and then at night reading bedtime stories. Regardless of what’s for dinner, we make it a point to eat as a family. Dinner is a time for my husband and I to hear all about their day. Everyone has a chance to recap their day (the girls even ask what we did at work), but the focus is mainly on the girls. They talk about what they did, how they did on tests, activities, issues and upcoming school events. Reading at night is another way for us to have quality time. Most of the time we read, but sometimes my oldest daughter uses it as an opportunity for us to talk.

My other favorite time is when we go camping as a family or anytime we are outdoors. My girls love the outdoors! Camping provides us time to reconnect with each other without the distraction of the TV, tablets, phones or texts. The time is spent doing what the girls love – swimming, riding bikes, playing, catching bugs, canoeing and making s’mores. Some of our best memories involve the outdoors.



Making the most of the winter weather.

Metroparent offers some great tips on how working moms can create quality time with their children.

When I started to think about the time I was spending time with my girls, I realized we do have a lot of quality time together. For us, our quality time is in the simple things.

How do you spend quality time with your child/children? What advice can you share?

“Mean” moms rule!

I distinctly remember the first time my oldest daughter called me mean. After the shock and hurt wore off, I thought, “am I really mean?”

As I see it, being a mom it’s my responsibility to protect her, help her make good decisions, and raise a young lady who respects herself and others. I am her mother, not her friend.

A product of “mean” parents myself, they created a foundation in me that would later allow me to succeed in life. And I want the same for my girls.

I came across this article recently, 12 ways to be the meanest mom in the world, and I was excited to learn I was doing a great job living up to my new title! 

Any decisions or activities that make your kids groan, whine or cry are probably putting you on the path to earn your ‘mean mom’ badge. Below are a few of my ‘mean’ traits.

I tell my kids ‘no’ and mean it. Even though my girls are old enough to question my decisions, I stand firm and provide an explanation they understand. If they press the issue, they know there will be consequences (and I follow through on that too).

I give my girls chores. Growing up I cut grass, changed the oil in my parents’ car, shoveled snow, dusted the house … you name it. Chores build confidence and give them tools they can use as adults.  

I don’t follow the crowd. I am confident in my decisions as a parent – even the unpopular ones. When my oldest was six she was invited to a sleepover at her friend’s house that we barely knew; I told her she couldn’t go. I agreed to a playdate, and went with her to get to know her friend’s parents. I even explained to the other mom why she couldn’t spend the night.

My kids respect me. I have an awesome relationship with my girls and they know they’re loved, but they also respect me. We laugh, act silly, and do fun things together. They know who is in charge, and it’s not them.

I hold my girls accountable for their actions and behavior. My girls aren’t perfect and when they misbehave, there are consequences. They are also learning to be responsible for themselves and their things. Recently my daughter forgot to do her homework. She tried to complete it in the morning as we’re getting ready, but there wasn’t enough time so I made her turn it in incomplete. I emailed her teacher to let her know we were aware it was unfinished and she would take whatever consequence the teacher gave her. That day at recess, she sat on the wall for not doing her assignment.

Despite being a mean mom, I tell my girls every day that I love them. Comedian Anita Renfroe does an excellent job summarizing all the mean (and nice) things moms say in a day.